Improve your FEEDBACK process

 Improve your FEEDBACK process 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
Let us understand one more cause and effect of people's emotions.
 
By nature, most of us do not like when someone is pointing us and giving feedback. In a professional setup, we tend to listen to other’s views on our behavior or actions, but most of the time, we do not internalize. As a result, only a few people have the mindset to accept feedback as an opportunity for improvement.

The reason could be how we give feedback and how others receive it determines whether the feedback is genuine or criticism.

 We have discussed some insights on feedback from both GIVER and RECEIVER perspectives sometime back, and the link is given below.

https://lifeexcellenceinsights.blogspot.com/2019/10/responding-to-feedback.html

 https://lifeexcellenceinsights.blogspot.com/2017/04/mind-your-intention-while-giving.html
 
To overcome the above challenges in perceiving the feedback as criticism, the modern coaches suggest a new way of giving the feedback, and they coin the word “feed-forward.” The purpose is identical in both terminologies, but the only difference is in Feed-forward; we intend others to correct or improve the behavior with our collaborative, suggestive approach.
 
For example,

Assume that your colleague made a report with many analytical typo errors. You can give feedback that the report is full of mistakes and this needs to be improved. Depending on the person, the feedback will be perceived as a criticism or improvement area. In this process, you are just focusing on the PAST and no interest or suggestions to improve.
 
Whereas in the Feedforward scenario, you jointly work with him/her to improve the analytical, typo errors aspects in the future. You may be suggesting different ways to enhance the presentation like software installation etc. In this process, the receiver senses the message for improvement and clarifies the improvement methodologies.

The purpose of indicating poor performance is met, and in addition with FUTURE actions are also indicated. So this is something proactive and friendly approach to dealing with people on improving the poor performance or behavior.

This feed-forward calls for patience, passion for helping others. In my opinion, that is required for the people managers if you want to improve your people management skills.

Just try the feed-forward method in your professional interaction, as this works for me.

Let us some insights next week and stay safe till then!

Recognize others for good behavior & task

 Recognize others for good behavior & task 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
Let us understand one more cause and effect of people's emotions.
 
We, as human beings, always look for recognition; that is, we expect others to acknowledge us for our behavior and tasks. That is nature. When someone recognizes or acknowledges us, we tend to repeat the same behavior or task to them in the future as well.

For example,

You recognize your colleague who had managed a crisis very well, and you acknowledge him/ her and say, “hi, you managed the situation very well.” This recognition will reside with him/ her forever, and he/ she will repeat the same behavior/action when a similar situation arises. That is the cause and effect of human emotions.

(Note that you just recognized and acknowledged, not even appreciated, There is a thin difference between appreciation and recognition)
 
Recently, i watched one of the reputed CEO’s interviews in which he responded to a question,” When are the happiest moments in your work?”. He replied," whenever someone recognizes my work, I feel happy. Adding to that, he narrated, "When i  present something to my board of directors and when they acknowledge and say, “Presentation is good,” that is enough for me to feel happy.”
 
From the interview, i  realized that whether you are CEO/ Business head with a proven track record or a beginner at a young age, all the people, as human beings, expect others to recognize our good behavior or actions.
 
If you understand this insight and acknowledge someone for their good behavior or actions or effort (not even result), they will repeat the same behavior many times. That is one of the simplest ways to get things done and manage the relationship. (i.e., People skills)

It looks elementary and common sense, but most of us ignore this aspect either due to taking a granted attitude or being egoistic of not expressing out.

Many times i realized that only when we are internally happy, we do recognize and appreciate others. When we are in a low state, we never recognize the good things.

Hence, be in a higher, positive state, look around and recognize your colleagues / junior colleagues for good behavior and task, making us good at people skills.

Let us discuss some more insights on people skills next week.

Stay safe till then.

People do for their reasons.

 People do for their reasons. 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
Let us understand one more cause and effect of people's emotions.

Many of us might have come across a situation where colleagues or junior colleagues agreed to do some tasks when we said, but never did it as per commitment or done with after many followups or completed with half-heartedly.

Some managers use to complain that people are not doing the task as they want them to do.

“The reason is that people are doing the things for their reasons, not for your reasons.”

The only reason for others to do is “THEY WANT TO DO."

Many times, our wants (reasons) and other wants (reason) is different. When there is a conflict of interest, things will not happen as we expect.

We can bridge the gap only through a trusted relationship, feedback, and in turn, positively influencing.

Some time back, i have experienced this conflict with one of my clients. I wanted them to prepare a macrolevel plan for an important project. They seem to be understood the context, importance and agreed to do so. But things got delayed, and i realized that my want(reasons) and their want (reason) are not matching.
My reason for the macro-level plan was to judge the potential quickly, and their reason was to arrive at the plan they should have more data, accuracy, availability of time, and so on. Because of many if's and buts, they did not want to initiate the task.

On realising the gap, i worked with them further to brief the benefits of quick overview and also clarified some of the ambiguities. Then finally things were done.

My key  realizations are 

Generally, people want to do as the intention is right, but other issues like doubt, lack of clarity, fear pulls them from doing it.
 
As leaders/managers, we need to establish the compelling need for completing the task to others. That can be done by building trust in what we say and how we say. It is mainly about bringing more clarity on the intention and transferring the same emotional aspect to others. Let us discuss the various methods in the coming weeks.

We need to clarify whether others have understood our wants/reasons. Most of the time, the feedback aspect we forget as we generally tend to say/hear, what we want to say/ hear, other things we use to filter or ignore it. We miss seeing things from other’s perspectives.
 
The key learning is that people are motivated to do things only when aligned with WHAT they WANT TO DO. Relating that WANT and bringing the motivation to do it through interpersonal and communication skills is essential for any leaders/ managers in getting things done.

Let us discuss some other people's skills next week.

Stay safe till then!
 

What kind of emotional experience do others get from you?

 What kind of emotional experience do others get from you? 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

 As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
Before getting into the techniques, let us understand some of the principles of human emotions.

The ultimate purpose of people skills is to get things done and maintain a high quality of relationships.

Lesson 2: 
 
By nature, as human beings, we are always keen on either maximizing pleasure or minimizing pain in any actions and interactions with others.
 
Pleasure includes the feeling of pride, happiness, enthusiasm, fun, respect, joy, learning new things, and any other positive emotions.

Pain includes guilty, sadness, embarrassment, shame, feeling inferior, and any other non-positive emotions.

We always try to maximize pleasure and avoid pain.

For example,

At a personal level, when we take a task, we would like to complete it to get the most satisfaction from it, and we do not want it to get incomplete and then get the feeling of regret. For instance, when we make mistakes, we tend to explain as our mind does not accept the pain of realizing our incapability of not making things right. To avoid emotional pain, we justify with logic. That is the nature of us.

Similarly, at an interpersonal level, people are looking for gaining positive emotional experience from the work (like pride, appreciation, empowerment, learning something new) rather than non-positive experience from the work (like getting blamed, frustrated, feeling low, etc.).

To sum up, either at a self-level or an interpersonal level, everyone desires to maximize pleasure, minimize pain, or even avoid the pain.

If we want to improve people management skills, we need to remember this principle.

Also, we need to ask ourselves is, what kind of emotional experience are we giving to the people when they interact or work with us?

Are we giving others the most positive emotional experience, like respect, making others feel good, secure, comfortable to express, or another way?

When we enhance the positive emotional experience of others, we strengthen our people skills, that is, getting things done and improving the quality of relationships.
 
Let us learn some more principles next week.

Stay safe till then!

How our belief system affects people's skills?

 How our belief system affects people's skills?

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
Before getting into the techniques, let us understand the cause and effect of our beliefs on people skills.

The ultimate purpose of people skills is to get things done and maintain a high quality of relationships.
 
Lesson 1: How our belief systems or assumptions affects the people skill?
 
The belief system is nothing but what we believe as truth or simply our assumptions. This belief or assumption plays a significant role in getting things done and maintaining relationships with others.

For example,

As a manager or the business head, you are supposed to send the quotation for an inquiry, and you are delegating the task to your junior colleague by stating that the task is URGENT.
 
Even after two days, you are not getting the tasks done by your colleague, and you call him/ her and get into an argument, and finally, somehow task is completed.

Here only your belief or assumptions and your junior colleagues’ beliefs or assumptions work against both.

When you refer URGENT, say, for example, you assume that TODAY is urgent, whereas your junior colleagues believe that TOMORROW is urgent. Why is there a difference in assumption? Because both are coming from different experiences and backgrounds and inturn the assumptions or beliefs are also different. Both look at things from their angle based on their BELIEF SYSTEM.
 
Naturally, when there is a difference in assumptions or beliefs, there is a high chance of not getting things done on time, or there may be a strain in the relationship.
 
When you understand this lesson, you may change your communication by stating when you want the quote, say by stating today evening at 4 pm.
 
The point is that we need to ensure the following when we assign the task to others.

• Clarify whether our assumptions and others' assumptions are the same or not?
• What questions do we need to ask others to ensure they are in the same assumptions as ours?
• What information do we need to give to avoid the conflict of assumptions or beliefs?

When we know the difference exists in ASSUMPTIONS OR BELIEFS in each individual, we can change our communication practices! That will help to improve our people skills.

Let us discuss other lessons next week.

Stay safe till then!

Book on Influencing

 Book on Influencing 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

 

As we initiated the discussion on People Skills at the workplace, some people responded acquiring people skills is challenging, and some replied that skills would come by experience. In my opinion, all are true.
When we say SKILL, it is an application of knowledge. It calls for learning the knowledge through observation, books, other learning contents, and then experimenting with practical life.

Reading books may be helpful to enhance the perspectives on people's emotions, dynamics of action, or behaviors and learn some of the proven ways to deal with people's challenges.

Recently I came across one such book as suggested by a Human resource friend, and I think it is relevant for people skill topic.

Book Title: Winning Without Intimidation 

I suggest reading this book as e-books are available as this will enhance our perspectives on influencing others to get things done in a professional environment.

Let us discuss more insights about dealing with people's challenges and influencing next week.

Stay safe till then!

Developing People Management Skill

 Developing People Management Skill 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)
 

As you recall that when we initiated this series on managing emotions for personal and professional growth, we discussed broadly three parts of emotional intelligence

1. Managing self
2. Achievement orientation
3. Managing others

Having discussed the first two parts, let us discuss some of the insights related to Managing Others.

In a professional or organizational context, "managing others" means managing the people to balance both the result and the relationship. The people could be your boss, colleagues, and your junior colleagues.

Some of the questions or dilemma most of the business head and manager  have 

 “How to keep the people motivated to get most despite the challenges and uncertainties”?

"Am I a good leader or manager?"
 
"Am I focussing more on task and compromising soft aspects or more lenient on people and losing focus on the task?"

"Am I balancing task/ result and people/ relationship well?"
 
For all the questions above, the answer lies in our ability to manage emotions regarding people management. People management skill is all about that ability.

Why is people management skill important?

We might have come across some very competent managers in technical or functional expertise but still struggling to cope with relating people and relationship management. Their career growth also slows after some time.

Even with moderate technical or functional expertise, some people are pretty successful in achievement by leveraging people around them. They are liked by all and perceived by others as influencers.

When you are moving up in career ladder, people's skills play a significant role along with functional expertise.
 
Where the gap exists?

The gap is mainly on managing emotions when dealing with people. It is the ability to relate with the people, motivate, tap the potential, manage conflicts, solve complex problems, and influence anyone beyond the functional boundaries.

                                       
 
Let us discuss those aspects in the coming weeks and solicit your personal experiences or challenges on people management.

Stay safe until then!