Beyond Criticism

 Beyond Criticism 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some of the proven processes to apply when dealing with people.
 
Last week, we discussed a mature process of criticizing by "beginning your criticism with praise".

I requote the example for quick recall,

Your team presents you with a proposal for a new initiative, and you find that it lacks data, analysis, and proper justification. Instead of scrapping the recommendation by stating it as wasting of time, you can express, “Hi, the intent of new idea and thought process is good, but nowhere the proposal justifies the need for it. The proposal is substandard in its find need to work further on it.”
 
 
Compared to bluntly criticizing and hurting others, the method of "beginning criticism with praising"  seems to be a better option to some extent. However, there is scope for further improvement.

Do you think that smart and sensitive people would not recognize your sugar-coated way of criticism? People would be happy with your praise till they hear the word “BUT". When people hear the second part of the statement, they become resentful or feel low. Then they may even doubt the genuine of your praise.

I want to indicate that this method of beginning your criticism with praise would not work for smart and sensitive people. If you want to help them realize their mistakes or overcome some of the behaviors, you need to go one step beyond criticism.

The steps beyond criticism are

1) Encourage them and give a feeling that their mistakes can be correctable
2) Show them or demonstrate to them what needs to be done

In the above example,

In addition to the opinion, you can suggest or guide them on what needs to be modified in the proposal. In that way, you demonstrate genuine care for people’s mistakes or behavior, and you are part of them. That will make people take the intention of criticism in the real spirit.

To sum up,
 

• Criticize gently by beginning the criticism with praise
• Encourage or give a feeling that they can correct the mistakes 
• Go beyond by guiding them or demonstrating them.

 When you want to persuade people to get things done, you need to practice an effective way of criticizing others when it is really required. Leaders are expected to be a facilitator than a commander in today's professional environment.

Are you criticizing performance or people?

 Are you criticizing performance or people? 

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some of the proven processes to apply when dealing with people.
 

One of the typical moments we come across in our day-to-day professional life is giving our opinion to someone on his/ her performance or task. In this process, our intention is most of the time to correct the behavior but unfortunately ended up with criticism. We may be harsh and straight in our views. The strange part is others may not realize the intention and likely perceive it as criticism.

The side effects of criticism would be resentment, defensive, argument, and getting hurt.

As leaders or managers, we always have a dilemma on our communication style, whether we are giving constructive feedback or blunt criticism.

When you observe effective people, they never hesitate to give feedback when they see a sub-standard performance, but they never make it as criticism. They are aware of the fact that any perceived criticism will not solve the problem. They use the simple technique of “Begin criticism with praise.”
 
For example,

Your team presents a proposal for a new initiative, and you find that it lacks data, analysis, and proper justification. Instead of scrapping the proposal by stating it as wasting of time, you can express, “Hi, the intent of new idea and thought process is good, but nowhere the proposal justifies the need for it. The proposal is substandard, and the team needs to work further on it.”
 
In the above example, you are criticizing the performance and not the individual. You begin with praising the people‘s ideas and attacking the substandard of the report or performance only. In this way of response, likely no one will get hurt, and also others would take the message from the right perspective.
 
The point is that we cannot avoid giving feedback in a professional environment. However, we need to ensure the feedback should not be taken as criticism, which hurts the people and sometimes leads to defensive and argument. One effective way of dealing with low performance is to begin your criticism with praise.

This process needs awareness of our communication style when dealing with people. Just try it next time.

Let us discuss some more aspects of criticizing next week.

Power of Edifying others

 Power of Edifying others

(Emotional Management for Personal & Professional Growth Series)

As we discuss the topic of "People Skill at the workplace," let us discuss some insights on improving people's skill management techniques.
 
For the last few weeks, we have discussed some of the cause and effect of human emotions like pain vs. pleasure, recognizing, appreciation, people's reasons for their actions, beliefs behind the behavior, etc.
 
Now let us discuss some of the proven processes to apply when dealing with people. One such process is “EDIFYING.”

The meaning of Edifying is to build.

“If you edify a person for some qualities,” means you build a person for those qualities. You may be building the quality himself/herself and the minds of other people as well.

Edify a person, to others and themselves, even for the things you wish they would do. They'll soon begin to "believe in the qualities " and start adopting the traits and behaviors for which they are being edified.

For example,

Your friend  praised you and said, “you are very punctual for every occasion and straightforward in expressing your views.” This expression is something your friend edifies you (build) for those positive qualities.
Eventually, you behave up to, at least to friend's expectation of being punctual and straightforward as much as possible. Indirectly you strive to be consistent on those behaviors for which you have been edified.
 
It happened to me also in my school days, even though I did not know the meaning of edifying. Whenever i was promoted to the next class, the class teacher informed the next standard class teacher that i was a brilliant student. This used to happen every year and to maintain that “Build-up”! i  was striving hard to be a “ so-called" brilliant student in academics ( fortunately or unfortunately, i have never been excelling other than academics.I wish someone edified for other talents).

You can relate in your life that someone introduced you to the third person with some buildup; subsequently, the third person might have treated you according to what he was briefed.

That is the power of edifying as it emerges from the deep emotion of human beings that we want to be notable and recognized for something. We strive to meet the expectation.

In a professional environment, this is one of the powerful processes every leader can adopt by identifying positive qualities in each people and making the person aware of  (as 1-1 basis) or in front of others. That edifying process will make the person or make others expect the behavior from the person.

When you expand this concept, you can edify your team and your industry as well. Because what you expect comes to you.