We are always surrounded by two types of people and they influence the progress in personal and professional life. They are either past oriented or future oriented.
They display certain characterizes with us during any interactions
Past-oriented:
They are more oriented towards past.Whenever we propose or suggest something, they immediately respond as follows
"I had already tried this.it won’t work or I had done those days itself, nothing new".
Either way, like legacy or past wound memories, affect our progress on the proposal.
Future-oriented:
They are more oriented towards future, possibilities, and opportunities and always look for new. They are too optimistic or positive about new possibilities, but they may be encouraging you to progress.
In one of the interview, Google CEO Mr.Sundar Pitchai was asked about his selection as CEO and the reason for it. He replied with guessing that one of the reasons could be his practice of thinking and be interacting with his management team about the future possibilities of Google products and services. That may be one of the reasons he was chosen for this role.
The point is that legacy or past worries may not help today as the environment is keeping on change. The world is looking for futurist and who can think of new possibilities and opportunities.
Just be aware of your style of the thinking process and whom you are surrounded most of the time, past or future reminders?
There was a king offered a prize to the artists who would paint the best picture to represent “PEACE”. Many artists tried and only two artists came for the final round.The king looked at both artists’ picture.
One picture was of a calm lake surrounded by peaceful mountains with green trees. Overhead there was a blue sky with white clouds.The picture looked cool and everyone felt this picture would win the prize.
The other picture also had mountains, but with rough surface and plain. The overhead was the sky with dark clouds, from which rain fell and lightning was also shown. This did not represent peaceful at all. But when the king looked closely, he saw behind the waterfall, a tiny bush growing in a crack in the rock. In the bush, a bird had built the nest.The bird was sitting in perfect peace in midst of the lightning and raining.
The king chose the second picture and surprised all. He explained that peace does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise and trouble. Real peace means to be in the midst of all those troubles and still be calm in the heart.
Moral of the story is that how we maintain our coolness and peace at heart amidst all the troubles and challenges in life.Some times we are disturbed due to external factors.Real maturity is being calm despite external challenges and this is what we need to learn.
There is no doubt that quality of thinking determines our quality of life. Equally the WORDS we use daily or frequently in personal & professional life determines our personality and quality of life. The type of words we use frequently either makes or hurts.
If we observe highly effective people, we may notice that they are very careful in choosing the words while speaking/writing and they use mostly energizing words as much as possible. By that way, they are influencing others positively.
Some of the words frequently used by them
Thanks / Please / Help / challenge /well/ gifted/ blessing / appreciate/ excellence/ excellent/healthy/ wealthy / effort / goodwill / good / nice/ faith full / extraordinary/ grace/ possibilities / Responsibility / vision / inspiring / winning spirit / happy/ opportunities, challenges /growth/ Success /grateful / learning
Those words are not cliché. They represent the person’s attitude towards life.
Just be aware of your words as they silently making an impact in your inner world which manifest as your personality externally.
Some people, they are gifted with right usage of words due to their upbringing and environment. But others, the good news is that it can be learned and inculcated with effort.
Pl SHARE to me some of the ENERGISING WORDS you come across as you use or from others!!!
Most of the communication and interpersonal relationship issues in the organization or in family arise when we are not understanding others from their perspective, from their thinking and feeling. This result in arguments, blaming, abusing and finally results in straining the quality of the relationship.
Everyone has their own stories and hardships. If we understand others, their thinking, their feeling, then our way of looking at them would be different as everyone is undergoing different emotions at any point in time and to deal with them, empathy is required.
I came across a below video which explains the empathy in a beautiful way and I understand that this is being used for educating medical professionals to treat others in an empathetic way …
Pl watch it when you have time …thanks to Cleveland clinics on education series
https://goo.gl/YqsP2H
One of the common complaints or phrases, I use to hear in an unorganized or small organization from employees is “I am not getting appreciation from my colleagues or manager”. In fact, it is not heard in a family environment, but it would be the hidden cause of all the domestic arguments and fights.It is particularly from spouse!
Why we are reluctant to appreciate others when they do even small good work?
The psychological reasons for this reluctance to appreciate others could be
Fear of losing control
More of self-centered and thinking as if no time for anything else
Taking granted others as they are part of us
Poor self-esteem or low confidence
Not being in awareness or always busy in something
This needs self-introspection within us.
One of the studies said that the person needs to be in a positive frame of mind. If one is not in a positive state, he/she cannot able to appreciate others. Hence, appreciation is not for only motivating others, it is a measure of our wellness of mental strength.
Relook your habit of appreciation of others and frequency, especially the people in your family and the people are working for you. It reflects your mental health.
We enjoy what we do only when the colleagues, partners, teammates are in almost same wavelength, that is a similar thought process, acceptance, understandings about the intentions etc .However in reality, we may work with the people who may not be similar thought level. Practically you may not have an immediate solution to move away from them, the only option left out is to cope with them.
How to deal with those people?
Accept their qualities as such. The moment you accept them, you mentally prepare yourself to work with them
As you think more about them, you are developing negativity about others and reinforce your non-acceptance.
Think & distant yourself beyond them as life provides a lot of opportunities to enjoy and then you realize how small they are in your life
Least, you relate with nature.Nothing lasts forever like cyclic of day and night.Everything will change
The point is you can not change all the things as you like, but you need to adapt to reality as ultimately you need to do a lot in a short span and your peace of mind is important!
In personal and business environments, sometimes we may feel upset when our work is not recognized as it supposed to be or when the effort does not produce right results. If you observe some highly effective people, they continue to be persistent in their efforts and moved on. It is more perspective on how they look at the at the efforts and result.
You may be aware of the incident that happened to Thomas Alva Edison as he had done thousands of experiments to find an alternative for lead in storage batteries, but could not succeed.. When one of his associate friends asked about his guilt about his effort vs. result, Thomas replied, “ I have got a lot of results from effort’s.Now i know several thousand things that won’t work.This learning experience will help me to find the right alternative”. Rest of the history we know.
Key learning’s from highly effective people's perspective
1. Result is not in our hand, but effort
2. Each effort is not a waste, it gives experience to us
3. Life is all about experience
4. One experience leads to another experience, by the way, we mature
5. Eventually, your effort & experience produces results.
The point is how we look at each experience, effort, moments in life and move on!
